"It is what it is." How many times have you heard this line? How many times have you used this line to describe a situation that just isn't going to change? A situation or circumstance that happened to you and you just have to accept it.
Every fiber of my being screams, NO! when I hear those words uttered carelessly as an excuse as to why things are the way they are. This phrase gives away all your power to those around you, to the situation, and leaves you feeling like a helpless victim. This is not a fun place to be. It sucks! Feeling like you have no choice in the matter, and things won't change feels like wearing a straight-jacket through life. NO!
I recently took a relationship course at it talked about this very line. "It is what it is." is a myth. It represents a fixed mindset. A mindset that tells you "This is the way it has always been, so this is the way it will remain." This is not true! God doesn't look at your past to determine your future. You can have a radically different future than your past. Look around for all the examples!
Those people you just thought of. The ones that turned their lives around. The ones that may have done prison time but now are on stages inspiring thousands. The down and out single mother who is now running multi-million dollar companies. Yes. Those examples. The one difference between them and someone who believes in "It is what it is" is mindset. Specifically a growth mindset.
A growth mindset tells you things like, "It is like this, but how do I want it to be?" "I can seek outside resources to help me change this." " I can learn anything I want to." "When I fail, I learn." " When things get hard, I persevere."
The first step in identifying your mindset is being a gentle observer of your thoughts. Your thoughts will tell you everything you need to know. It helps to journal out what you are thinking. I used to not do this, and think "Oh, I know this." I grew up with a severely fixed mindset up until my late 20s. But really, as I wrote things down my true mindset became clearer. And when I understood where I was at, I could then chart a path forward towards a growth mindset.
Try it for yourself and let me know how it goes.
xoxo
Megan
Reference:
The amazing LoveLife Hacks course by Jourdain Blue. Look her up. She is seriously awesome! :)
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